Lost any respect for a school counselor

[Jeff_MP]

Anyone else notice that pretty much all of the school counselors are religious nutcases?

Basically, I have a high school counselor that I used to trust pretty well. He always helped me with getting my ridiculous clutter of a schedule to work (basically AP, Honors, and a career course in one), and helped me with other things as well. He seems like a good family man who cares about people, but still understands how we feel sometimes.

Even so, I finally brought up the issue of my circumcision. He was curious as to why I never really trusted my parents anymore, and why I seemed a bit more negative in my outlook to the world (just more realistic is all.). When we got down to the issue, and how my circumcision made me feel......he failed me.
He went into a whole mess about how it is a great decision by my parents, its so much more sanitary, and all the anti-foreskin bullshit these pro-circ nazis throw out. Even worse, he suggested that it was a "family tradition," and I should be a good son and honor those traditions as a son, and father in the future! For one thing, hell no....I will NEVER have my son(s) EVER circumcised unless it is the absolute life or death situation. Two, I dont care about family traditions, especially ones that are a bunch of bullshit, and mutilate the most sensitive part of a 2 DAY OLD BABY!
I have lost all respect for that man. He would go so far as to say I should honor tradition, that its "not mutilation", and the anger and pain I feel is just my teenage rebellion against something I "dont understand" yet. I know there are some counselors who do care and have different views, but he failed me. I have lost all respect for him.....

[Mincan]

Good for you. Sound like a good person. :)

[peterpink]

It sounds as though he thinks if the father is missing body parts, the son should have these removed also so the father does not feel bad. He is obviously circumcised himself and is in denial that it is harmful. If he thinks it is not mutilation, ask him how much tissue has to be removed before it is mutilation. Male circumcision removes more tissue (as it will eventually grow to in the adult male) than the majority of female circumcisions. Just because customs are family traditions does not mean they are ethical e.g. foot binding and breast ironing.

Your counselor is a very superficial person who does not think deeply - this fits with him being religious. (Recently it was revealed that even atheists knew more about religion than religious adherents.) A real counselor listens to people's feelings, rather than the content of what they say, and reflects these feelings back so that the client understands that the counselor has listened to them. This has not happened in your case. He has failed in his most basic techniques.

It is fine to feel let down and manipulated (you were brave to bring the matter up), but now you need to become more proactive and educate him because he is so ignorant. Print off these two papers and give to him.
http://www.cirp.org/library/anatomy/cold-taylor/ and http://www.nocirc.org/touch-test/bju_6685.pdf Do not be surprised if he rejects what you give him. What he believes is the majority belief for your culture in the USA. Also religious people are extremely resistant to new ideas and can be very bigoted and lacking in any real compassion despite what they preach.

Well done and good luck.:)

[kestrelsire]

^^^

[Jeff_MP]

Thanks for the links. Im a junior this year, so I'm stuck with him for another year. Luckily, he's not going to be my main scheduling counselor anymore. He listens to what I have to say usually, but he makes it seem like its my fault on certain things (how is it my fault that I feel bad/vengeful for having part of my penis permanently ruined for the rest of my life?). I'll handle him somehow.

[Dasher]

I wouldn't worry too much about the counselor. He sounds like an ignorant bozo.
What I find amusing is that he is probably two or three times your age, yet you are more informed on this subject than he is. On this topic, you are more qualified to be counselling someone than he is. The other thing is, in public schools especially, you have to be prepared to deal with unthinking, gullible people who have swallowed the big lie about circumcision totally. They are so brainwashed that they can't accept that there might be another side to the story.

But what sets this guy apart is his insistence that you maintain "family tradition". In other words, he is horrified by the prospect of you maybe breaking the chain of mutilation that is supposed to be handed down from father to son. Once the chain of mutilation is broken, and you refuse to circumcise your sons, who knows what could happen? It could be the end of American culture as we know it. But when a barbaric crime against humanity, circumcision, is the "family tradition", America would be better off without it.

Every so often public high school can surprise you. I saw a teacher correct a girl who was telling another girl that a certain boy wasn't circumcised and his penis was gross. The teacher, an Italian-American who was probably intact, told her that that's the way boys were supposed to be, and that "God doesn't make junk."

[Lonewolf]

I would feel the same way the guy is a bastard to tell you that crap

[kestrelsire]

My high school guidance counselor was an alcoholic who told me I would not not go far in life and refused to write anything on my behalf, or even sign my application forms, until the principal interceded on my behalf. She met with me twice, for a total of about 10 minutes during my entire time in high school. We never got around to discussing circumcision. So people can really let us down sometimes in many different ways.

It's OK to ignore what your counselor tells you.

[admin]

It's OK to ignore what your counselor tells you.

Come to think of it, our high school said there's a procedure to request a different counselor if personalities clash.

[adam34]

Well yeah he might come off as a douche, but remember he's just a high school counselor, his main job is supposed to be to help you with courses, and issues with other students, not to give you advice on family issues.

The last thing he or the school wants is for him to support you in a clash against your parents so they can go complain to the school board.

And as far as not trusting your parents over circumcision, if your mistrust is really based on just that, I really don't think you have a just case, most likely they were fed bs by doctors or whoever, and they thought they were doing something good for you and probably didn't know any better.

[slickskin]

Anyone else notice that pretty much all of the school counselors are religious nutcases?

Basically, I have a high school counselor that I used to trust pretty well. He always helped me with getting my ridiculous clutter of a schedule to work (basically AP, Honors, and a career course in one), and helped me with other things as well. He seems like a good family man who cares about people, but still understands how we feel sometimes.

Even so, I finally brought up the issue of my circumcision. He was curious as to why I never really trusted my parents anymore, and why I seemed a bit more negative in my outlook to the world (just more realistic is all.). When we got down to the issue, and how my circumcision made me feel......he failed me.
He went into a whole mess about how it is a great decision by my parents, its so much more sanitary, and all the anti-foreskin bullshit these pro-circ nazis throw out. Even worse, he suggested that it was a "family tradition," and I should be a good son and honor those traditions as a son, and father in the future! For one thing, hell no....I will NEVER have my son(s) EVER circumcised unless it is the absolute life or death situation. Two, I dont care about family traditions, especially ones that are a bunch of bullshit, and mutilate the most sensitive part of a 2 DAY OLD BABY!
I have lost all respect for that man. He would go so far as to say I should honor tradition, that its "not mutilation", and the anger and pain I feel is just my teenage rebellion against something I "dont understand" yet. I know there are some counselors who do care and have different views, but he failed me. I have lost all respect for him.....

It sounds like this asshole is circumcised himself and in denial. He doesn't deserve and respect. As for your parents, you don't need to forgive them. Just know that they were probably pressured, and really did think that circumcision was in your best interest.